once again i am awake bright and early in the morning. actually i haven't been to sleep yet. i have no clue why i can't sleep but i guess eventually it will come. now i am having one of those days where i am feeling sorry for myself i guess. i just hurt so bad and i feel so bad about myself. i feel like i am 50 and should be crippled up in a wheelchair and i feel like i weigh 200 pounds. i don't know...i just don't like myself today for some reason. you would think it would have been last week when i was pmsing but nope. it's almost like everything i have done recently just hasn't been good enough. for instance, like making out the schedule. i did the best i could but was informed that i was going sink. i can't help it that everyone needs a particular day off. i try to do everything the best of my ability but sometimes i seem to fall short of certain standards. yeah i know, i am just having a pity party but it is 4 am and i am still awake after not going to sleep yesterday until 5 am and i am entitled to it. i am just so tired and wore out, i just don't know when all of the chaos will end...
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